Today on Clear Your Clutter Inside & out we are talking about what you’re afraid to let go of in your physical stuff.
Are you worried that you’ll lose knowledge if you give away your books? Have you given something away in the past only to discover that you needed it? Do you worry if you give the object away that you’ll lose the memory of what the object represented? Learn how to become aware of why you’re holding onto things as we begin our month focusing on paying attention.
Take actions from today’s podcast:
- Discover what physical items you’re afraid to let go of
- Understand why you’re afraid to let go
- Address your fears
- Be present
- Make a list of everything you’ll gain when you let your physical clutter go
- Find solutions
- Sell, donate, or give away anything you’re able to
To learn how Julie can support you: https://reawakenyourbrilliance.com/
Certified life coach, author & award-winning professional life organizer Julie Coraccio shares steps and tips to support you in creating the life you choose, deserve and desire through decluttering your life, end of life planning, mindfulness and how to organize your life.
Julie Coraccio 0:01
Today on clear your clutter inside and out. We’re talking about what you’re afraid to let go of in your physical stuff. Are you worried that you’ll lose knowledge? If you give away your books? Have you given something away in the past? only to discover that later you needed it? Do you worry if you give the object away that you’ll lose the memory of what the item represented? Learn how to become more aware to why you’re holding on a thing as we begin our month focusing on paying attention. Do you control your clutter? Or does your clutter control you? unclear your clutter inside and out will teach you awareness as well as action steps to create change in your life. Come on. Let’s get started. The title FYI is from a Carlos diamond song for those who might keep track of when I try to slip a music title or name I’m now going with some choruses. I’ve been listening to Carly Simon a lot. I won’t sing it for you, I will spare you. It’s great because when I was first drafting this It reminded me that I needed to listen to music more and especially Carly Simon because I can sing Carly Simon rather loudly in the house. First a PSA. If something I say upsets are friends, you consider looking at it as an opportunity to heal yourself, as I’ve said on more than one occasion on this podcast. what others do and say is about them and how you respond is about you. I own what I do and say, and I encourage you to do the same thing. Also, consider giving me and anyone else the benefit For the doubt, and not assuming something about me or what I’ve said, and instead of assuming that I’m meaning this, I have a conversation. Don’t go right into saying I’m whatever, whatever. So just, that’s food for thought and for anyone else. And just for those of you who listen to me on pod bean, I can’t access comments. So I get an update from them. I think every month and I’ve given up trying to figure out Unfortunately, there’s not a way to comment on the podcast, you’re welcome to come over to the YouTube channel and comment if you like, you know, it’s one of the things that I get frustrated about, like for instance on I would love to be able to respond to something on Apple like one someone who reviewed me and gave me one star so they hated my guests and didn’t believe in her. Well, okay. I would like to have responded to that but Apple doesn’t give me the opportunity. Welcome, June. I cannot believe it that we are in June already, how do you feel, I will have my upcoming break coming up, which I think is a break for you as well as me. And I always want to keep this podcast as fresh and exciting as possible. I’m hopeful that when I come back from the second half of the year, that the traction next door will be done. I felt immense pressure to get the podcast on. Because I have no control over the schedule. And so it everything’s keeps getting pushed back. So at this point, who knows, maybe I’ll luck out and by the time August rolls around, that they will be done. Now if you listen to the end of May I change paying attention, in case you’re on autopilot with awareness. See, I am paying attention because I’ve always talked about awareness plus action equals change. A few years ago, I did 10 Minute Tips in June and so I kind of see this as something similar. We have five episodes this month, and I really wanted you to spend each week really focusing on paying attention. action items are less action, and keeping more with paying attention. It’s great if you take action on any of these, of course, and I always encourage it. But the real focus of this month is to
stretch your awareness muscles to get going and that to really pay attention. Today’s episode was inspired by my husband, I love him. My hope for you is if you’re listening is that you have someone that loves you unconditionally. And that if you’re still searching for a partner that you find someone that just loves you, no matter what I can be a challenge to love and yet my husband still manages to do it. And the example I’m going to share be how challenging I am. So I have been really tired lately. I’m hoping that surgery is going to help with that. And so there are some days I will sleep really late. I mean like 10am, which I think is super duper late. Obviously if I have some Thing planned or I have a client that I’m not going to sleep in, but if I know I don’t have anything scheduled The next day, you know, I was up early today for an interview. I am going to sleep in and so I woke up 10 and the cats hadn’t been fed. Now they always have dry food. I mean, they act like we never feed them. They always have dry food out. And but they hadn’t had their wet food and we have routine we definitely have wet food in the morning. Cats hadn’t been fed, the dishwasher hadn’t been emptied. And there were a pile of dishes, because I’ve done a lot of cooking. So I’d run a load but you know, went to bed. And so there were dishes in the sink. And I was really frustrated. I said, I didn’t you know, I love you and you’re so great. And I need you to pay attention. I need to not I don’t want to have to ask you to do this. I need you to increase your awareness that if I’m sleeping that late, I’m obviously really tired. And then I need you to just step it up. I’m happy 95% of the time to do the chores. I mean, he helps me with cleaning And he does litter boxes. I don’t want to paint him as some evil man. But it’s just like a really help in that moment. And so that kind of inspired today about paying attention and, and just becoming aware of yourself and your surroundings. awareness of whatever our clutter is, is half the above. If you don’t get the awareness, there is a good chance your clutter return, not always. But keep getting a better awareness of yourself. It helps in all areas of your life. So awareness and paying attention is a key. You can figure out why or have some aha moment that’s fantastic. But the purpose of the month really is about practicing paying attention, snapping out of autopilot. How many times are you zoning out, just unaware, going through the motions each day? Being on autopilot? reminder, we’re in the no judgement zone. I think that’s from planet fit. And it’s the same here. Be like a neutral observer, or an excited archaeologist or researcher going on mysterious excavation. Okay, that’s I don’t want you in judgment. I want you like, Okay, I’m digging deeper and finding out about myself. This is awesome. What can I learn about myself this week? too. Today we’re specifically going to talk about physical clutter. Because maybe you’re afraid of losing something. Why are you holding on to an item? Maybe you haven’t used it in the past few years. Maybe you’ve never used it. Maybe you don’t even like it. Right? I run into a lot of people that have wedding gifts that they didn’t like when they got married 20 years ago. First thing I’m going to suggest thinking about is shifting your perspective. I see many people focus on what they’re going to lose when they give something away. And that’s where I want you to pay attention for the week. Instead of focusing on what lose focus on what you’ll gain. Especially if you’re struggling. I was working with a client recently, who was an older woman. And she was focusing on the fact that we wanted to she was elderly and work with our family and that we wanted to take things and clear her clutter. And after a couple of conversations when we’re like, we’re concerned about your health. This is about your safety and well being and after a couple conversations with that, she was able to say, Okay, this is what it’s about, they This is their concern. And she instead of focusing on the negative of what was being cleared out of the home, focus on the positive, have more clarity, better health, and be safe. So I encourage you to shift your perspective to the positive we’re able to first set the intention that you’ll be able to see or be shown to pay attention, what objects you’re having trouble releasing. Here are some of the things I found myself and clients if you have listened to me, you know books are really challenging for me to release it probably the most challenging area. Other stuff, I’m able to let go fairly easily but I could sit, I have one bookcase, but it might take me an hour or two to go through because I would think thoughtfully about the book so I can appreciate it.
So you might be afraid if you have books that you will lose what you’ve learned, right? It’s like, oh, I’ve gained that knowledge. What if I give the book away? Will my knowledge go away? objects, people, many people are afraid that they let the object go the memory will go with them. That is a big one for people. Have you found that out about yourself? And you might find that out this week. And again, I think it’s amazing when you can continue to peel back the layers of yourself and figure out more of yourself and getting to know yourself and you might have have been like Wow, I’ve been really good. I have decluttered annually for the past five years and then I discovered I had been holding on to this item because it really was I was afraid that the memory was going to go away if I gave it away, so it’s all good. Sometimes, we aren’t able to let stuff go because we were like we’re losing money. Oh, I paid $50 for that blouse. And I never wore Oh, come on. I can’t believe it. I just threw might as well burn $50 I’m losing money here. that’s frustrating. I can’t let it go. I spent money on it. You might be holding on to something also. Because you feel you can get money for it and you haven’t been able to sell it. And so you’ve tried to sell it a couple times and it hasn’t sold and just become clutter. So again, you viewed as a I’m losing money. You might need it someday. Oh, I can’t let it go. I know I haven’t used it three years ago, but I might need it someday. Have you found yourself thinking that or saying that out loud? You might have a bigger story going on of why you’re afraid to let some stuff go, for instance, you might have grown up without a lot of money, you might have been poor and you didn’t have a lot. And so there is this desire to keep everything they’re able to buy. And it can remind you, maybe, that, wow, I’ve achieved a lot Look, I’ve been able to buy stuff, this shows that I achieved I was able to pull myself out by the bootstraps and get out of poverty. Or you might take a little different perspective and be like, you know what, if I have this stuff, you know, keep being poor. I never want to go back that I never want to feel like that ever, again, not having enough money. Of course you can understand being wrong. Be gentle with yourself. You would have compassion if a friend were to share that for you. So those are just some thoughts of why you might be holding on to things. And so for the week, I’d like you to simply pay attention. If you want to go further, I’m going to share what you can do. But if all you do is pay attention and discover something, you’re good to go. Practice paying attention for the weeks that following five episodes. And it might be harder and take more energy than you think. Again, right? It’s really easy to just go on autopilot. You don’t have to think I was having a conversation with someone in my mind and I didn’t say it out loud. I’m trying to be very I’m not don’t want my energy drained from certain people. I thought, you know, you’ve put yourself in this position and one of the reasons I believe is because you don’t have to think can just be told what to do. Well, you know, you give up freedom but then you know for some people I’d rather just be told to do adulting is not for everyone. I have found that to be true. You have all the answers you need within got clutter 365 journal prompts books, supports you in figuring out how to clear your clutter. get control of your clutter, so your clutter doesn’t control you. reclaim time, money, sanity and resources. Choose from physical or mental, emotional, spiritual holidays or compilation volumes one two and three. Free mp3 meditation with purchase. Learn more at reawaken your brilliance, calm or purchase on Amazon. So after the week if you’ve paid attention And even you know what, as I think about this, as I’m speaking, I would include this with the paying attention part because I think this could be very valuable because again, the more we learn about ourselves, the more easily we’re able to pay attention.
So I encourage you, perhaps to have a dialogue, either from your neutral, your higher your observer itself, with the object, and again, get neutral, but have a conversation. You know, why have I held on to you? What have you represented in my life and see if something come and you know, a big believer of having gratitude and saying thank you for an object, I think that that’s really important, but just consider having a dialogue. And it’s interesting that something that might come up might nothing might not come up, but you might have a conversation out of it. If you’re coming from kind of the higher the non ego self, and getting in that place of neutrality, you might discover there’s something really interesting about you or the object or why you were holding on to it. Again, you know your subconscious is at work and all that good fun stuff. And I’m a big believer of doing that. As you’re thinking, and paying attention, see if you can figure out what you’re afraid of losing I mentioned some examples earlier. What am I really afraid of? Because really, if you give the object away, likelihood in most instances is nothing. If you give away your books are you afraid that you will be seen as less intelligent as less studious if you gave have given in the past giving away something needed all met that’s happened to me once or twice in my life. But you know what i have have really come to believe trust that I will get what I need when I need it. clearing out the clutter, and decluttering My life is way more important to me than an object I can if really super necessary, I can go out and buy another object, I can rent it, I might be able to borrow it. There are lots of options now. And the older I get, I know that it’s the priority is to release more objects. And if upon occasion, like has happened to me, you’ve let something go and you’ve needed it. If that’s happened once or twice or a couple times a handful time. I think that’s okay. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. And I wouldn’t stress too much about it again, I think if you get in the habit and you trust you’ll need when you need it. I don’t know if I told this story. So I have the new headset and I was doing an interview. And I’m gonna have her on the show, but she sent me the headset and I’ve been thinking like Oh, you know what I’ve been because I do on YouTube. For those of you watching on YouTube, what do you notice it’s different about me, you will see my husband did not notice this, but we’ll see if you did. And I thought, oh, I’ve got to do research. And then I didn’t even ask and a headset shows up in the mail. So when you get in the flow of life and trust life, more things like that happen, so I just share that little story with you. So again, if you give something away, and end up needing it, it’s going to be okay. Most of the time you won’t. Memory. Now I’m going to be honest, my grandma had Alzheimer’s. That’s my biggest fear. It’s my biggest fear of aging is getting Alzheimer’s and I fear that my memories will fade away. But right now the memories are intact. I believe my memories not only in my head, but they’re in a heart right because I come from that perspective of everything being energy. And and so the heart is real. The emotions and memories are there as well as in my brain. They’re not in the object. So do you really believe that you’ll lose the memory? If you give it away? I’m going to encourage you again on all these areas. Challenge yourself, is it really, I have found more often than not, there’s just layers to everything. And as I feel back, I learned more becomes easier to relate. But maybe it’s not a fear, the memory will go away for you. Now, maybe you’re like me and you have a fear of Alzheimers, that that’s a concern. Or maybe you are concerned that you would upset your mother but what that’s really about as you have guilty feelings that you didn’t spend enough time with her because you lived out of state during her end of life care. Just an example off the top my head. Again, that’s what I’m talking about, pay attention and increase your awareness as much as possible. So those are just a couple things. And that kind of goes back to having a dialogue with the object because a sweater might be easier to have a dialogue and face that conversation with yourself about the guilt, about feeling like you weren’t there enough for your mother, then having a conversation with a sibling, right? some conversations are hard, and that makes it easier.
We’re paying attention. But if you’re like, you know what I’m really jazzed up, I’m going to offer a couple solutions for you to think about. Again, if all you do is pay attention this week, you have have gotten an A plus. So for instance, if you are afraid of releasing your books, what can you do if you need to find a reference? Go to a library. Google, Ask an Expert. What I want you to realize here is that there are solutions. One of the things is you always have a choice. Doing nothing is a choice, and too many times so quit immediately. Oh, I can’t do this. There’s no solution. I’m not Not true. This is kind of where I want you to, to kind of get into that groove. As I mentioned a moment ago, sometimes you give away something and need it. Can you run it to the friend half one? Can you borrow from a neighbor, there are solutions and then become present. Because as we’re dialoguing with these objects are trying to clear clutter. Sometimes we get in the past and we get in the future. It’s sort of the past or future, it’s going to be harder to release it. So become present as much as you’re possible. You can just close your eyes. Take 10 deep breaths, help get grounded and that’s something that can bring you into the present moment. As I mentioned earlier, ask yourself what you’ll gain when you declutter. So as you have this awareness of the physical objects, I was talking with the elderly client Are all the positives that you’re going to gain? When you declutter and let go those objects, see we have this belief, oh, I might need it or I’ll lose knowledge. But where do you again? Well, you know what you might gain some room and your bookshelf to bring in even more knowledge that you didn’t know about even more books that make you excited that give you more depth to something that you were learning and studying. I was talking I did an interview recently for a podcast and I was talking with someone about brand new relationships and she had shared that she was struggling with releasing some friendships that weren’t that great for her. I said, but when you release those that gives you the room to bring more into your life. And that’s, I think, an overall thing I want you to consider when you release that clutter. Everything is energy. What are you going to bring into your life when you have clutter, you’re jammed up and you can’t bring anything in Release it that opens you wide open. If you’re considering taking actions, do that, see what you can sell, donate give away. Take the time to purge into clutter. Now might not be the time you’ll have knowledge though, if you’ve paid attention, the next time you purge and when you have those bits of information, it makes it go so much easier. I we are going to move again was unexpected and so I’m downsizing even more. And I’m, for whatever reason, I kind of was like, Oh, I’m going to take the year I know we want to sell our house didn’t do it. So downsize in a really short amount of time. So this time I’m taking the whole year it feels really good. I’m able to let go of more. But the things that I’ve learned about myself have made decluttering a lot easier. And it’s gone a lot more quickly. play a couple of my rooms I’ve been able to do and a half an hour. That’s pretty quick. Pay attention this week, and learn what you’re holding on to take action from today’s podcast. Discover what physical items you’re afraid to let go up. Understand why you’re afraid to let go of if possible. address your fears. Be present. Make a list of everything you’ll gain when you let your physical clutter go. find solutions if you’d like sell, donate or give away anything you’re able to pay attention for the entire week. of where you struggle to let things go. On our next episode, we’re talking about where you’re withholding love. Though out, clear your clutter to create the life you choose deserve and desire.
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Transcribed by https://otter.ai
About Clear Your Clutter Inside & Out
Clutter is stuck stagnant energy and prevents you from creating the life you choose, desire and deserve. We discuss clutter in all its forms: energetic, spiritual, emotional, mental & physical, relationships, health, finances and more. We share tips and take action steps for clutter free living and how to organize your life and death with end of life planning. We’re thinking outside the box on areas where people might not realize where clutter is blocking them. When we remove clutter from our lives we can discover our passions, lead the extraordinary lives we are all meant to live and share our gifts with the world.