The first part of my blog on relationship closure was posted on December 9th. Be sure to read!
Once you have become conscious of a relationship that you seek closure for, you have some options.
Take that awareness to a deeper level. Why have you held on? Why can you not let this relationship go? What role have you played in the relationship? Most of the time we like to play he victim and never see how we contributed to a less than ideal relationship. Have you been playing the victim? What has that given you? Do the best you can and be open to exploring. Perhaps be open to working with a professional.
Honor whatever you are feeling. I Cried like an animal for 20 minutes when I knew a relationship was truly over. After that, I knew I was done. I felt an immediate peace. And I have nothing but gratitude for this man and our time together. He gave me some gifts that allowed me to be open to meeting my husband.
We’re not done. Time to Take action!
It might be getting rid of his favorite outfit, a painting she did for you (when I ended a relationship with a friend when I was living in LA I gave a painting she did to a co-worker. I loved that painting, but I loved being rid of her and her energy more. Maybe it is unfriending someone on Facebook. If there is drama, use the unfollow button.
If you are not letting go, do some digging.
Perhaps you would like to have a conversation for closure. I am purposefully not using the word NEED here. Closure is something you do for yourself, you don’t need another to accomplish this.
This is an option, but I encourage out you have ZERO expectations. I cannot emphasize this enough. Expecting someone else to give you what you are looking for is a recipe for disaster. You need to figure out how to get closure by and for yourself. Again, maybe no action needs to happen. I cried and after that got rid of a few remaining mementos I had from our time together.
What practice could you do to celebrate your closure on a relationship? I have heard of divorce parties, but you could also do a ceremony to honor what you learned from the person and the relationship. I Mentioned earlier I bear no ill will towards an ex and have gratitude because of what he allowed me to be open to. Could you celebrate that in some way?
Maybe you go to a restaurant you used to frequent and have one last meal and offer the person a toast. Bring joy into the ceremony because when you release what no longer serves you, you can bring in what you desire.
Take aways from both decluttering blogs on getting closure from a relationship:
- If you are unsure, of what relationship clutter you would like to get closure on, ask yourself some questions. Is there anyone you are holding a grudge against? When you hear a persons name or see them, do you get upset or angry? Is there someone who wronged you that has passed that you feel won’t allow you closure?
- Just because someone has passed, doesn’t mean that people do or easily release grudges. Even if someone isn’t here in physical form, you can still get closure. It might take some more work and maybe some creativity, but it can be done.
- It is an option to have a conversation for closure. If you do go this route, have zero expectations. Closure is something you do for yourself; you don’t need another to accomplish this.
Why do you need closure? What can help you get closure with a relationship(s)? How can you lower your expectations if you need to have a conversation?
Go out clear the clutter to create the life you choose, deserve and desire!
DIY Options to Clear Clutter
Purchase Julie’s books on how to clear clutter from your life: https://reawakenyourbrilliance.com/shop/
Subscribe to Clear Your Clutter Inside & Out Podcast https://reawakenyourbrilliance.com/life-coaching/podcast-coaching/self-help-podcast/
Check out more of my decluttering tips and how to get organized on my YouTube channel. https://www.youtube.com/user/SeibertRadio?feature=watch